The Case of the British Prime Minister, Piers Gaveston and the Deceased Porcine

September 22, 2015 in General

The British Prime Minister is in a tricky situation as a result of his past involvement with an Oxford University drinking group, the Piers Gaveston Society. This 28-year-old drinking society is composed of twelve former public schoolboys at Oxford University. Its main interaction with the wider student body is its exclusive yearly ball, which allows revellers in fancy dress or fetish attire to climb aboard a coach to a secret location outside the city and engage in louche behaviour, said to often include indulgence in illegal substances. Named in honour of a  male lover of King Edward II (1284-1327), the club seems highly camp—its motto is Fane non memini ne audisse unum alterum ita dilixisse, or “Truly, none remember hearing of a man enjoying another so much.’

Involvement within the Oxford University society of inebriated elite students is one of the recent allegations made in an unauthorised biography of David Cameron by Tory peer Lord Ashcroft and published today in the Daily Mail. Cameron is said to have participated in a grotesque initiation stunt  for the society in the 1980s which reportedly involved oral pleasure with a dead pig. Downing Street has dismissed the claims as “nonsense,”reported UK Tory website  Politicshome . Cameron has already endured years of mockery for his involvement in another scandalous Oxford University drinking society, the Bullingdon Club. In another section of the expose, Ashcroft reveals that  David Cameron’s own mother was against his sanction for  marriage equality.  The book, Call Me Dave, has been a huge talking point all week thanks to certain allegations about the adolescent activities of a certain future premier and the aforementioned allegations about close encounters of the deceased porcine kind.

Other former members of the group include writer and son of the Duchess of Cornwall Tom Parker Bowles and Private Eye editor Ian Hislop, who profits considerably from publishing tales of excess and scandal among the rich and mindless. There is no suggestion that either man or any other former member participated in any of the acts of which Cameron is accused.  Gaystarnews wryly added that two European Union jurisdictions prohibit marriage equality, yet zoophilia is perfectly legal within their borders- Roumania and Finland. According to New Statesman journalist Stephen Bush (21.09.2015), apparently Cameron’s deed is not zoophilia, because under British law, that would have involved penetration of a porcine anus or vagina.


Josh Lowe: “What is the Piers Gaveston Society?” Prospect: 21.09.2015:

Stephen Bush: “Will Lord Ashcroft’s scandalous biography harm David Cameron?” New Statesman: 21.09.2015:




Comments are closed.