Superpolygamist!!!

February 12, 2015 in General

During the debate over marriage equality two years ago, Family First and its bizarre entourage kept pontificating that  same-sex monogamous marriage equality “would lead to” straight polygamy. There’s just one slight problem with this, and it’s called Canada. As I’ve noted, Canada has (a) legislated for marriage equality and (b) wants to ban straight polygamy, although there are doubts about whether they’ll get that far before Canada’s general election later this year. However, I have found some more evidence of creeping, insidious tolerance for “plural marriage”, in the yellowing pages of Superman’s Girlfriend Lois Lane, circa CE 1965!!!

Back in yesteryear half a century or so ago, DC Comics, Superman’s publishers, had a burgeoning multiverse of potentially infinite numbers of alternate universes, some containing minor variations in terms of the core cast’s personal biographies, others radically divergent from established continuity or historical events. Thus it was with a particularly convoluted Lois Lane story in which Lois and her romantic rival Lana Lang happened upon a deaged Superbaby, and decided to behaviourally condition him to fall in love with them. It didn’t work, because the Superbaby in question was Superman from an alternate Earth. For a totally inexplicable reason, a transdimensional scanner then showed the alternate universe Superbaby (now restored to adulthood) simultaneously proposing to Lois and Lana!!! Why? Well, in that alternate universe, straight polygamy is (gasp!!!) completely legal!!! The final frame shows Lois and Lana, each in bridal drag, draped over Superman’s arms, looking radiantly happy.  Evidently in that universe (at a guess), the US Supreme Court upheld Utah/Deseret’s “right” to polygamous relationships and so the US Congress was forced to let Utah Territory join the United States with polygamous marriages intact back in 1890.  Naughty Superman!!! What a filthy alternate universe!!!  Sadly, in DC’s Crisis on Infinite Earths back in 1985, they did some spring cleaning and flushed the multiverse and its bewildering range of alternate Earths down the metaphorical sink. They restored it in 2009, but with only fifty two left, and the Superpolygamist AU was not amongst them- at least, not to our knowledge. There are about seven AUs of unknown provenance in the New 52′s DC multiverse, and it’d be nice if that particular one had somehow gotten inadvertently restored.

Source: Brian Cronin:  ”I Love Ya But You’re Strange: That Time Lois Lane Hypnotised a Baby to Make Superman Marry Her” Comic Book Resources: 16.06.2013: http://goodcomics.comicbookresources.com/2013/06/16/i-love-ya-but-youre-strange-that-time-lois-lane-hypnotized-a-baby-to-make-superman-marry-her/

 

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