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Monday 08 November 2010


Vanity Rules

6th June 2010


Posted by: un-pc lesbian

As rough trade toy boi alluded to in a comment below, there was a bit of whimpering and dithering over what to name this blog as I wanted it to be something relevant. In my world vanity is very relevant so hence the title. 

I think vanity is a admirable quality in a person so I don’t see why the word itself gets such bad press. Pride is very closely related to vanity, yet while the word pride carries positive feeling, vanity is lumbered with negative baggage. My old favourite dictionarydotcom defines vanity  as; “excessive pride in one’s appearance, qualities, abilities, achievements, etc.”  Implying that excessive pride is bad, that showing great concern for ones appearance is Not Good. I so disagree.  

I quite openly admit that I am vain, that I have a huge amount of concern for what I am wearing and what I look like to others. I take pride in the fact that I am vain, but sadly this is not so for many other lesbians. For so many the fact that one has sex with girls seems to be a license to eat all the pies and give up on any attempt at sartorial style. Why is this? Surely one should strive to look hot no matter what gender they prefer between the sheets.

I’m not going to prattle on too much about lesbian fashion, as I’ve done it before, but I do wonder why so many lesbians seem to treat clothes as just something to cover the body with, and not a tool to enhance their looks. You know, the flannel shirt and t shirt brigade, or the ones who have their “going out” t shirt and jeans. How is that combo different from the ones you do the housework in? Belts, they are an accessory. If you need one to pull in and hold your jeans up then your jeans are the wrong size, buy ones that fit. I’m sure Hallensteins secretly has a range of jeans they call lesbian jeans!

Bra’s, they are vital yet why do so many persist in not wearing one. Is it some sort of political feminist statement? Now there’s a topic I don’t understand, not wearing a bra as a political action. Hmmmm, I’m still trying to find a political movement that encourages the male of the species to have the boy’s hanging free as a statement of support. (or lack of, chortle chortle). If breasts are an issue there are plenty of trained fitters out there who can fit you to enhance or minimise whichever your preference is. So much nicer than having them hanging free and looking as though they are trying to reach the belt for some support.

 It’s well known that I work out a lot, and I openly admit I do it out of sheer vanity. I like to eat what I want and wear clothes of a particular size range, therefore I workout to achieve this. Any other health benefits are just a by product of my vanity; ergo vanity is good for the body. However, I’m not implying that pride and vanity is a size issue, that is a whole other topic as one can look hot irrespective of size, but it is about personal respect.

We so often hear the words “Out and Proud” yet it seems that while many are proud of their sexuality and being open about it they are not so proud of their appearance. I think if more lesbians showed a bit more excessive pride in their appearance, or just plain old vanity, then we wouldn’t get images like the one below circulating the internet so often.


Tags: General

12 responses so far ↓

  • 1 RTTB // Jun 7, 2010 at 7:32 am

    I would just like to point out that pride is one of the seven deadly sins, and vanity is not.


  • 2 un-pc lesbian // Jun 7, 2010 at 11:24 am

    Eggggsactly. Funny how “Out and Proud” sounds acceptable yet “out and Vain” conjures a whole different image.

  • 3 l_isit // Jun 7, 2010 at 6:32 pm

    ah so sad but so true! love it :)

  • 4 Queene of the Desert // Jun 8, 2010 at 11:45 am

    Pride may be a sin, by surely confidence is not? And who decides where these lines are drawn anyway? I’m pretty sure that gays in particular have gotten past caring about that sort of thing? Maybe I’m simply hoplessly optomistic… I think vanity is a wonderful thing, so long as one doesn’t lose sight of everything else. It’s all a very fine balance…


  • 5 Craig // Jun 8, 2010 at 3:57 pm

    Is vanity strictly a high femme thang, or is there also butch vanity?

  • 6 un-pc lesbian // Jun 8, 2010 at 6:50 pm

    Craig, absolutely butch vanity exists, and when I cover that topic will point you to some great examples - swoon……

    And then of course there is trans vanity, which I am doing close up and detailed research on!

    TimTam, no confidence is not a sin, and is admirable, but really confidence shouldn’t be used as an excuse to walk round looking like a pile of dog poo.

  • 7 Craig // Jun 10, 2010 at 12:18 pm

    Speaking of “sins”, here’s one for you- greed. In a certain television series that involves a lesbian medical practitioner, soon coming to an end, she doesn’t end up with a long-term relationship -but she does end up with a professional partnership and more dosh!

    So…take the woman? Or take the money and promotion? Please do a column on this!

  • 8 un-pc lesbian // Jun 10, 2010 at 10:23 pm

    Well in my world Craig the answer is obvious, the money and the promotion of course, no question about it.

    Long-term relationship? Bah! Will take the Gay “what second date” over the lesbian “second date syndrome” any day.

    Question though, why do you equate the woman taking more money and a promotion as greed? Would it still be greed if done by a male, or would it be an astute career move?

  • 9 Clasp // Jun 11, 2010 at 12:05 pm

    Firstly- thank you for pointing out that there is a middle ground for our lesbian sisters between promoting compulsory burkas, and dressing like a rapist.

    I’d really appreciate if you could now move on to making the same point about manners. Too many Sapphites seem to believe that being rude at will to everyone they come across somehow makes you look ‘empowered’. But guess what? It doesn’t. It makes you look arrogant and ignorant.

  • 10 Craig // Jun 11, 2010 at 6:12 pm

    Greed knows no gender. I have absolutely no objection whatsoever if a hardworking and diligent lesbian climbs up the corporate ladder and it’ll be great when we get to our first out lesbian PM (or President…). However, I shudder to think about more dubious ‘firsts’ like the advent of avaricious, corrupt LGBT corporate high fliers and CEOs, on the other hand.

    As for the fictional lesbian in question, I’m firmly on her side- particularly given what she’s had to put up with as resident voice of sanity when working alongside her straight male colleagues.
    She deserves the danger money!

    Speaking of vanity, though, what about an article on great lesbian stylistas of yesteryear- particularly the immortal Tallulah Bankhead, who quipped:
    “Mama warned me about men and alcohol. She didn’t say anything about women and cocaine!”

  • 11 Dot Ardella // Jul 22, 2010 at 7:48 pm

    Each to their own. Kudos to you for having pride in your own appearance, and for feeling good about what you project. However just because other lesbians fails to meet your own aesthetic requirements, I would not assume that they no thought to their appearance, or their own desired personality projection.

  • 12 un-pc lesbian // Jul 26, 2010 at 2:48 pm

    Dot Ardella, by inserting what I assume is the missing word in your last sentence so that makes comprehensible sense, you propound an even scarier theory.

    Why would anyone, of any sexual persuasion at all, want to walk round looking like they have no pride or respect in their appearance at all. To walk around looking like a slob, and by way of your statement doing it deliberately as projection of their personality, is just plain sad.

    If their outward appearance to the world is of a slovenly unattractive mess, isn’t it sad that this is what they think of themselves and the image they want to portray to the world?

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