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Author Topic: Monogamy within gay relationships:  (Read 739 times)
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kinda_invisable
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« Reply #15 on: 06 February 2010, 02:24:PM »

Hubby and I have been 2ghter comming up 9 years - and in all that time only ever been jst the 2 of us.

There is a lot of assumptions made about gay relationships - one of the biggest being that becuase its 2 guys there is almost zero chance of them being faithful.

There is also a lot of hype that assumes that monogamy is the only reason for couples to keep together.  Because it assumes there are no other pressure on couples challenging their relationship.  Breaking up is not because of a lack of faith within the relationship.  What I find interesting is that commitment or lack of it relies almost exclusively on monogamy.  There is more to it than that.  Anyone who believes that monogamy is the ultimate gel in a committed relationship is sadly mistaken, and probably not realistic enough to pursue it yet.
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« Reply #16 on: 06 February 2010, 02:26:PM »

nor did I suggest you said that.

bluntmuffin thinks that gay men not being monogmous paints them in a bad light.  I don't think it does.  So I am asking why he thinks not being monogmous in a relationship (again, not cheating) is such a bad thing.
It's not, but if one of them in the relationship is more keen on the idea of monogamy, but agreed to the open style of relationship, because they knew the other can't do it, it seems a bit bad for that person, as they will be monogamous, and know that their partner isn't. It would create some issues.
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« Reply #17 on: 06 February 2010, 02:26:PM »

Anyway...

Read his posts again. Hes not suggesting wat u r saying.
He had a valid point IK.
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« Reply #18 on: 06 February 2010, 02:32:PM »

He had a valid point IK.

The point that monog. is not the only type of relationship is vaild. Its not for everyone.

That BM was saying if ur not momog. when in a relationship then thats a bad thing is not vaild and he needs to re-read wat was said.
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« Reply #19 on: 06 February 2010, 02:46:PM »

It paints gay men in a negative light
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yanto harkness
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« Reply #20 on: 06 February 2010, 03:48:PM »

No need for monogomy. Like being in a straight relationship
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« Reply #21 on: 06 February 2010, 03:52:PM »

Well guess it makes me old fashioned.My parents have been happily married for close to 50 yrs.Both in early 70's and they still are in love with each other.I am not comparing homosexual as to heterosexual there,but not once have they felt compelled to have sex outside the marriage.Why should it be necessary with gay men to have sex outside the relationship.I personally dont get it.Enlighten me and then state your case.

I personally do not agree with open relationships.Its my opinion.

My first bf when I was 19.He and me battled because he wanted sex outside our relationship.Kicked his asshole to the kerb.

I guess I was just brought up to believe if YOU commit to someone as you do,there should be no need to look outside for extra dick
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« Reply #22 on: 06 February 2010, 03:53:PM »

Well guess it makes me old fashioned.My parents have been happily married for close to 50 yrs.Both in early 70's and they still are in love with each other.I am not comparing homosexual as to heterosexual there,but not once have they felt compelled to have sex outside the marriage.Why should it be necessary with gay men to have sex outside the relationship.I personally dont get it.Enlighten me and then state your case.

I personally do not agree with open relationships.Its my opinion.

My first bf when I was 19.He and me battled because he wanted sex outside our relationship.Kicked his asshole to the kerb.

I guess I was just brought up to believe if YOU commit to someone as you do,there should be no need to look outside for extra dick

Totally agree
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« Reply #23 on: 06 February 2010, 04:01:PM »

I don't think it says anything about the people in a relationship. I have no issues about monogomy just do not see it as a neccesary part to make a relationship work. And my friends who have been together fifteen to twenty years are all open
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« Reply #24 on: 06 February 2010, 04:09:PM »

No need for monogomy. Like being in a straight relationship

Oh please. If a gay cpl want to be monog. thats gr8, and it is not like being in a str8 relationship. Its being in a relationship where u are xclusive - be u gay or str8.

Or r u suggesting that str8 cpls dont play around on each other, dont have open relationships etc...
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« Reply #25 on: 06 February 2010, 04:14:PM »

I personally do not agree with open relationships.Its my opinion.

But are u saying those who do not have the same view on relationships as u do are bad?? That not being xclusive is a negative thing? (even if u have a different view on wat relationships shld be).
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« Reply #26 on: 06 February 2010, 04:17:PM »

Wow pull back boys. No one is attacking you for your views. No one really cares it seems. All my relationships have been mostly closed, but it is not the big deal for me in a relationship.
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« Reply #27 on: 06 February 2010, 04:20:PM »

Wow pull back boys. No one is attacking you for your views. No one really cares it seems. All my relationships have been mostly closed, but it is not the big deal for me in a relationship.

Im jst pointing out the inacuracy of ur comment is all. ;0)
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« Reply #28 on: 06 February 2010, 04:22:PM »

But are u saying those who do not have the same view on relationships as u do are bad??

No I am not saying that.Everyone has their own views and theyre welcome to it.I was commentating on the survey and how it portrays gay males Smile

I added my personal view because I think debate regarding this IS healthy.even though I do not understand why people gay/straight/bisexual/trans etcetc (whatever has been added this week i am  unsure Tongue) who do this,do it or even feel the need

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« Reply #29 on: 06 February 2010, 04:23:PM »

Gee, so u werent saying not being monog. is a negative thing.

Oh Ozzzzzzmmaaann!!!! ;0D
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