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Wednesday 14 April 2010

Brüno's Top 10 Celebs

Posted in: Movies
By Brüno Gehard - 9th November 2009

In the week his DVD comes out, outrageous Austrian fashionista Brüno has named his top ten all-time favourite celebrities.

The flamboyant fashion victim - who famously asked his martial arts trainer "how do you defend yourself against a man with two dildos?" shared his list with…



Robert Pattinson – Vhen I landed on Eminem at ze MTV Movie Awards last year, what upset me most was zat Robert was sitting just 5 places away from him. Ich vould have loved it if it vas him who had ended up wearing my thighs as earrings und my kugelsack as a bowtie.

George Clooney – He gets more und more gorgeous every year. People wonder vhy he hasn't got married yet – it isn't because he hasn't found ze right partner yet, it's because he lives in LA und California law won't allow him to.

Michael Jackson – Vhy oh vhy did he have to die so young? People say he vas 50, but in fact, about 70% of his body vas less zan 15 years old.

Barack Obama – In terms of being a world leader, ich wish he would try to be more like Gandhi und just walk around in his underpants.

President Ahmedinijad of Iran – Ich love zis guy, he's so cute! He looks like Columbo's sexy cousin. Stop hating on him!! Vhy should America be ze only country allowed Presidents zat ze people didn't vote for?

Lady GaGa – Vhat a total genius; by getting everyone to talk about her clothes, she has diverted attention away from ze fact she has a face like a horse und her music ist hunddreck. By ze vay, ich know for a fact zat she should really be called, "Ladyboy Ga Ga".

Megan Fox – Beautiful, talented, likeable, intelligent, witty und modest are just some of ways Megan Fox has been described in interviews, by herself.

Daniel Radcliffe – He really has grown up; last year in Ibiza he gave my freund Gunther Weggs ein 'magic potion' of 2 parts vodka, 2 parts Red Bull und 1 part roofie. 4 days later Gunther had hogwarts all over his schvantzen.

Madonna – Now zat Michael's gone, she has become ze undisputed Queen of Pop - und it's a perfect swap, she's ze same age, just a bit less white und a bit less feminine.

Ashton Kutcher – His Twitter postings have been an inspiration to millions of kids. Zey have shown zat it's still possible to be really famous und really rich despite being barely literate und having an IQ of about 30.


The Bruno movie is out on DVD this week. See's review here.

Brüno Gehard - 9th November 2009

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