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August 25, 2009

Citizenship test

Via Diamond Geezer, a link to the official UK Citizenship Test site.
You need to get 80% of the answers correct before you can be granted British citizenship.
The questionnaire is surprisingly hard. No wonder many British people who sit the test fail.
That's not too different from the Dutch test we discussed earlier.
I got 67% of the Dutch test and 71% of the British one.

The New Zealand one is easy: root for the All Blacks, or just root one.


Summertime, and the living is easy

Belgian detective inspector arrested for driving around in his car in his underpants and leering at young girls, but freed since he didn't break any laws.

Albuquerque man Danny Brawner, pants down, bare assed and hanging free, was spotted having simulated sex with the trunk of his car. His arms were waving around in the air and he was shouting. He was indicted on two felony counts of aggravated indecent exposure. It’s classified a felony because a couple of kids witnessed the bizarre coupling.

Belgian man arrested in fast food joint for dropping his pants and touching himself. Police had to counsel families with kids watching while eating their burgers.

Amorous Nigerian couple in court for having sex on a church altar in Lagos. They were fined 117 euro and have to clean the church top to bottom to cleanse the sacrilege.


August 06, 2009

To prevent chaffing (sic)...

From the Manchester Evening News (via Naked Male News):
Watch Manager Neil Gyllenship and fire-fighter Dean Jagger, both of Manchester Airport Fire Service, will be making a gruelling 3000-mile journey across the Atlantic ocean. And they'll be doing the whole thing naked.
The pair, known as 'Team Heatwave', will be stripping off to take part in the Atlantic Rowing Race 2009 to raise money for north west charities Claire House Children's Hospice and Childflight.
At the launch at Manchester Airport's Terminal 2, the men posed naked in their rowing boat to mark the start of the campaign to raise over £100,000 for the two causes.
Dean, 40, from Mirfield, West Yorkshire, said: "We'll be rowing naked for the entire time we're out there to try to prevent chaffing, so we've been scrubbing our backsides and hands to try to toughen up our skin."
Rowing the Atlantic. In the buff. In December. With nothing but each other's hands to prevent chafing. I hate to think what those pasty, smooth bodies will look like at the end of their ordeal. Will there be enough baby oil in Antigua?

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August 05, 2009


Norwegian dance troups Frikar accompanied Alexander Rybak in his Eurovision Song Contest triumph, but they do a lot of other material too. Not all of it squeaky clean, it seems.
I quite liked their acrobatics on stage at the Eurovision.

Article about Frikar (in Norwegian). Link tip from Bjørn's Blog

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July 29, 2009

FINA to ban hi tech swimsuits

The wardrobe malfunction by Ricky Berens is not the reason why the International Swimming Federation is banning the hi-tech swimsuits.
But he proved that swimming bare-cracked wins championships.

So the FINA should order all swimmers to go bare-assed. It would work wonders for viewing figures too.

A win-win-win situation for all!

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Channeling Marky Mark

Via Naked Male News: NYC go go boy and his crew rap and strip. Who says men can't multitask?
Video and lyrics NSFW!


July 23, 2009

Gay portrait icons

The National Portrait Gallery in London asked random 10 gay celebrities to come up with 6 suggestions of people who are / were an inspiration to them for a portrait exhibition. And the result is, at least to Johann Hari, a disaster because it would have been a much better exhibition if it had been properly curated.

Now, who would I nominate as my 6 gay icons? Here they are: two film makers, two actors and two authors.

1. Kenneth Anger: granddaddy of the underground (gay) cinema. His films (especially the psychedelic stuff) are hard going for 21st century eyes, but the gay imagery is still totemic.

2. Derek Jarman: Renaissance man for our dark ages. Painter, film maker, writer, gardener. Both Mr Jarman and Mr Anger were fantastic to have tea with and had me gushing as a fan!

3. David Bowie (as Ziggy Stardust): glam rock rarely looked so gorgeous in the 1970s and never since. But he still looks gorgeous today aged 62.

4. Ewan MacGregor: nominated for the ease he has in portraying and handling his own sexuality on screen, never bashful to get his kit off, and completely unselfconscious about his heterosexuality. I wish all gay men were like him!

5. Le Marquis de Sade: for his magnum opus The 120 Days of Sodom, still an essential read if you want to understand human sexuality.

6. Boyd McDonald: author and editor of Straight To Hell: The Manhattan Review of Unnatural Acts magazine, Cruising the Movies and a raft of "chap books" with true homosexual reportage. Saint Boyd was able to make you laugh out loud with a roaring hardon. Not many authors are capable of that.


July 15, 2009

Which superhero am I?

You are Spider-Man
You are intelligent, witty, a bit geeky and have great power and responsibility.

The Flash
Green Lantern
Iron Man
Wonder Woman

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz

I always liked Adam West as Batman, but that just shows my age.
I definitely predicted I was not going to be Wonder Woman due to the lack of pointy bra wearing experience.


July 13, 2009

Hats off (and more) to strangers

Here is something our civilisation could learn from: when you go visiting, you take your kit off so your hosts can see you come in peace with nothing hidden.
Or as the Tribe show has it on the BBC:

When you come to Waiheke you have about 35 minutes on tne boat to get your gear off. Time enough to prepare to meet the locals. You can then proceed to our clothes-free beach. And a great time will be had by all.


July 05, 2009

Sex in the news

From the BBC:
An investigation is under way in Australia over claims that navy sailors competed with each other to bed their female colleagues for cash prizes.
According to Channel Seven news, sailors on board HMAS Success put a cash value on each woman's head.
Sleeping with a female officer or a lesbian, or having sex in a strange place, won more money, the report said.
The Defence Department confirmed that a number of individuals had been sent back to Australia for interviews.
HMAS Success, which has a crew of 220, is currently on exercises in South East Asia.
According to the Channel Seven report, the contest came to light in May, when the vessel was in Singapore.
It said that the sailors recorded their efforts in a book called The Ledger, challenging each other to sleep with as many female colleagues as possible.
Sex on a pool table or with a lesbian reportedly scored higher points.
The Defence Department did not confirm how many sailors were involved.
But, in a statement to Seven Network, it said that a number of concerns raised by female crew members were "now subject to formal inquiry".
The "veracity of any allegations" had yet to be confirmed, it said.
Several points in this story urge caution:
- Who actually pays the cash prizes?
- How are the scores verified (and the lesbians tagged)? Competitors (or contest adjudicators) must obviously be present to merit the extra points for pool table sex, and the women confirm a sailor's claim of conquest.
- No indication of any offences being committed here, apart from sex on the job - but I presume the contest took place outside working hours and on shore leave.
- That sleeping with your bunk mate doesn't merit any points indicate to me that it's too common an occurrence to be subject to a competition.
- And you would think that the navy brass would encourage its personnel to get all the exercise it can to fight the obesity epidemic in the Australian armed forces.

The NZ Herald editorial thundered on Saturday:
Nobody dares to moralise any more. The cause and consequence of that reluctance is that we are not sure we agree on what is wrong. Are the Australian sailors under naval investigation for their attitude to women and sex or for writing it down? And if it is merely the latter, was their offence against the privacy and reputations of the women concerned, and does it matter if the women were equally enthusiastic participants?
Who knows the women sailors were running a ledger book too with commentary on length, width, girth, stamina and technique the boys displayed (or pulled up short on). It would certainly make good reading too, a good consumer guide for on-board fun and it would put the rating back into rating.

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July 01, 2009

Pina Bausch (1940-2009)

Pina Bausch, dancer and choreographer at the Wuppertal Dance Theatre, died yesterday.
She was one of the most original choreographers, fusing humour, surrealism and physical theatre into her art.
Please, forget about moon-walking, Pina Bausch was the real thing.

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June 24, 2009

A simple solution

Money, freedom and easy access to girls in Western Europe have all been a long time magnet for boys from sexually repressive areas such as North Africa and the Middle East. Unfortunately, they do not often know how to handle that freedom and fall back on their original culture when they are confronted with locals who express their sexual freedoms too, such as gay men.
Lately this has often led to violence against gay men by Moroccan young men in The Netherlands, with the latest incident in Eindhoven where a gay man was pelted with eggs.

There is only one effective and simple solution for people who cannot abide by the standards of civilised living in Europe, and that is a one-way ticket on a cheap airline back to where they feel at home.

And regards the discussion in France on the "right" of Islamic women to wear a burqa, my response would be: when Saudi Arabia allows bikini on its beaches, France should allow burqas.

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June 23, 2009

Auckland Council Bill

Submissions on the Auckland Governance Bill have to be in by this Friday, so get your skates on if you haven't already. How to do this is explained here.
The text of the Bill is here, but you can only comment on the sections, not propose any new or radical ideas (such as abolishing property taxes and rates).

My submission is largely the same as the one I made for the Royal Commission last year:
Dear Sir,

Thank you for the opportunity to make a submission as a private citizen.
I have no particular expertise in local government - apart from paying rates - but as a Waiheke Islander, I am concerned that the future governance structure in Auckland will take insufficient stock of the needs and wants of small geographically distinct entities such as Waiheke Island and the other Hauraki Gulf islands.
It's a pity we can't have our County Council back unless we have 10,000 residents (at the last census we barely made it to 8,000) which would be my preference. So for the time being we have to deal with Babylon-Across-The-Sea that is Auckland City.

My submission concerns the future governance structure.

1 Auckland Council

Section 7: The new Auckland Council should become a geographical entity that will be known as Auckland around the world. The current city and district councils should be abolished and their current competences, such as planning, environment, dealing with central Government, transferred upwards to the new Council.
The non-urban areas of Rodney and Franklin should not be included.
The Council should run and own the regional entities responsible for water, sewage, transport, roads, infrastructure, culture and regional well-being.

Section 8: The Auckland Council should have 50 elected members from a proportional region-wide list system (the city as one ward) where your party list gets a seat for every 2% it polls in the election.
The leader of the faction who can form a workable majority on the Council should become leader - in effect a mini version of parliamentary democracy but with stricter proportionality.

Section 9: The leader of the faction who can form a workable majority on the Council should become Mayor - in effect a mini version of parliamentary democracy but with stricter proportionality.
No separate Maori seats are needed under this system as all votes will have equitable weighting under the proportional system.

2 Community Boards

Section 13: All localised issues such as district and local planning should be devolved downwards to the beefed-up community boards who should become responsible for local planning issues and all localised matters (following the subsidiarity principle that policies should be determined and carried out at the lowest possible level) and be properly funded for their allocated tasks.
Community boards should cover natural geographical entities within the region, but do not need to be of the same size or population.
They should be approved by a popular vote after their design.
Their number and boundaries should be determined by local demand.

I do not wish to make my submission in person. Thank you for your attention.

Yours sincerely,

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June 22, 2009

Greenland granted self-rule

From euronews:
The Queen of Denmark has handed over a new law on self-rule to the head of Greenland’s parliament. The nation has today been celebrating what it has declared Self Government Day. Many believe the new status will pave the way for total independence from Denmark. People voted for greater autonomy in a referendum last November.
Greenland authorities will now have control over many areas of government, including justice and police matters. However, Copenhagen will still have the finl say on defence and foreign policy. The country of 57,000 people is also being given rights to lucrative Arctic resources.
Fantastic news to have another small country join the world. It's a pity Greenland has no plans to re-join the European Union, despite Denmark keeping on having a say over their external affairs and providing a large dollop of aid.
The Economist has its doubts it will soon be an economically viable independent state, but gives it points for trying to.
Now if only they would stop whaling (and Iceland and Norway too)


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