National Library of New Zealand
Harvested by the National Library of New Zealand on: Oct 8 2008 at 10:42:39 GMT
Search boxes and external links may not function. Having trouble viewing this page? Click here
Close Minimize Help
Wayback Machine
GayNZ Logo & Link
Wednesday 08 October 2008

Get into shape with Julz!

Posted in: Features, Living Well
By Julz Darroch - 24th March 2008

Summer is coming again (at the end of winter and after spring)… so get a head-start on having a hotter body with our new personal trainer's practical tips.

Personal Trainer Julz Darroch
Isn't it funny? Summer arrives at the same time every year and yet we all wait until September before we look down, scream and start praying that kaftans will make a sudden comeback for beachwear this season.

In my brilliantness I've decided that the world would be a better place if I came up with a few easy solutions to get a head start on a hot summer body and in my generousness I've decided to share it with you.

The best part? It's not all about getting all sweaty and smelly!!

Home-style Baking

Bored and desperate housewives all over the country have used this subtle yet effective plan for years.

Step One: Whip up a batch of tasty treats, biscuits, muffins, and my personal favorite-ginger crunch.

Step Two: Invite everyone round for afternoon tea…

Step Three: Watch as your friends eagerly devour your offerings.

Step Four: Repeat

There's nothing like having everyone around you add a few kilos to make you feel fabulous in comparison. Tricky eh?

BE WARNED: this does not have quite the same impact when one consumes the baking oneself.

Home Fitness Equipment

Invest in some home fitness equipment.

It's general knowledge that most people buy this equipment then never uses it BUT what's not so widely known is that this doesn't matter.

It works two ways.

Calculate the bottles of chardonnay you'll be forgoing in order to purchase that superduper slimdown ab rocker. That's a lot of calories you now can't afford to drink! (Substituting vodka for wine doesn't have the same benefit as white spirits are lower in calories and therefore an essential part of any sensible diet plan).

And if that wasn't enough just imagine the awesome core workout to be gained by hauling yourself over the bloody thing as it sits perched in the corner of the lounge.

ADVANCED EXERCISERS: Build up some speed and you'll have the physique of a hurdler in no time (or an ab rocker up the arse and a bonus cardio workout for your loved one as you are carried off to A and E.)

Get a Trainer

After your first session you won't be able to lift your hands high enough to get any food in the direction of your mouth, and forget about takeaways, you won't be able to walk for a week!

Choose your trainer wisely; think high expectations and low body fat. That way you'll be too preoccupied by checking out your trainer's hot abs to notice the shitload of excessively difficult exercise you're being made to do!!


Teenage girls get muffins, gentle rolls of puppy fat that cascade over jeans waists, caused by too many takeaways.

Everyone on the other side of 30 gets 'Sav Pav'- an expanding waistline with a consistency like the middle of pavlova, caused by indulging in too many bottles of good wine.

Generally we avoid noticing this condition by covering it up in loose undergarmentsa. WRONG! Work out what your undies size is and buy up in a size lower. A couple of weeks of sucking your belly in motivate you to run like the wind.

Next Time: Rock hard abs for those too lazy to do too much hard work to get them.

Julz Darroch, 35, is a Wellington-based Personal Trainer and Fitness Educator, with 15 years experience in the fitness industry - beginning in shiny lycra as an aerobics instructor back in the early 90's and continuing on from there.

She currently works as a gym-based and mobile personal trainer, and regularly tortures Steve Grey and the Good Morning team on TVOne each Tuesday.

Julz is almost famous for her sparkling personality, crowd pleasing training style and sharp wit. In the straight world they call her 'quirky', but she says really she's just a dyke with tattoos and a funny haircut.

Send your fitness-related questions and personal training enquiries to .

Julz Darroch - 24th March 2008